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First Rule of Fear


The sands of time is an often used metaphor. If you have a handful of sand and squeeze into a fist, you'll actually increase the speed for losing valuable sand. The tighter the grip the more sand is lost from your fingers. Learning this is a practical way to let go of all that is especially in relation to time, letting go of the sand simulates the process for letting go of our fears. I will do my best to translate the misconception of fear from this perspective. First rule; ask yourself, is this my fear or is it a learned fear I have absorbed?

It is widely recognised that the most popular fear is public speaking (glossophobia). Since ancient times the Athenians spent time thinking specifically about speech communication. The word is a combination from the G

reek word for tongue (glossa) combined, of course, with the root word for fear (phobos.) In general terms we are an evolutionary species fear helps protect you and is therefore adaptive, functional, and necessary. However we are also manipulated and sold fear by our media and also marketed many products on this basis of fear, be it age (youth conscious, body type, skin tone), health (diet & nutrition), lifestyle envy (social media) and or our level of comfort and safety.

I have found the most resonance in this translation of fear by Michael Singer.

“You can push it away, or you can let it go,” Singer says simply. “You can either avoid it and be scared of it, or you can let it pass right through. Letting go of fear is not giving up in any way shape or form. Life is a natural unfolding of reality. You’re supposed to harmonise and work with it. You don’t give up and let it take over.”

Glossophobia is something we are all susceptible, and is associated to several comorbidities. For example simply standing up to publicly speak is not a measure of success for overcoming that fear, it is just one positive action, one step. I genuinely have an absorbed fear of public speaking, in combination with being an anxious introvert it forms a high functioning anxiety disorder where my default setting means I am driven by fear. In 2008 I walked through my glossophobia whilst working at Honda, our team won the UK, then placed top 10 in the European public speaking competition. I attribute my ability to perform down to the courage I received from my team mates. I firmly believe that you find what you are looking for, negativity or positivity. Only one will fuel your courage to add to your strength.

"He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life."

--Ralph Waldo Emerson

Let me know what you fear or your perspective?

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